Stress, balance, life

I have not been keeping my monthly resolutions.
Actually, I haven't made a new sheet since February...and that one ended in mid February.  That's four months!  Last week started my resolutions again.  I'm starting small and focusing on building up my routines again (water, exercise, sleep), finishing my dissertation (working on it everyday, even a little on the weekends), and looking for a job (working on it everyday, even ont he weekends).  So far it's been going well...aside from working too many hours on the dissertation and not enough hours on job search.  It's hard to stop something when I'm in the flow of it.  Perhaps I need to switch them and work a couple hours on job search first thing in the morning and work on my dissertation afterward.  The dissertation pieces are finite, once the analysis is done, it's done; once the text is revised, it's revised and can be sent for feedback.  The job search is open ended, and there I only have so much patience for doing internet searches, tailoring my resume, and filling out forms.

I told my advisor that I won't be working for him/her this summer, I want to focus on being done.  I can not explain what a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders!  I believe this is why I was so productive this week.  It's not so much that I was working a lot of hours for my advisor, most of the work was simple and could be done quickly, but it was the stress.  Stress eats up A LOT of time and energy and leaves little of both for other stressful projects...like a dissertation and job search.  Since stopping working for my advisor people have told me I look much lighter, less stressed.  I should have done this a lot sooner!  It was the worrying that I'd get a ridiculous and just plain mean e-mail any moment, worrying that I had to respond quickly because I'm supposed to be "on the clock".  Just the endless stress.  Now, some other students are working for my advisor, since I no longer am, and both look more stressed, especially one of them who has never worked for my advisor before.

Now it's time to get back in the swing of things and re-focus on my life and balance :)