Thursday, November 21, 2013

So, it's been a month since I defended and submitted my paperwork to my university and I feel great!!!  My stress levels have dropped tremendously!  My mood has improved, my habits have become healthier, I feel less rushed and harried.  I've even finished reading a book and started and finished another!!!  I can fully enjoy my weekends and after work hours :)

Buuuttt... I still sometimes get this anxious knot in my stomach that has become all too familiar over these past few years.  I'm calling it grad school PTSD.  Because that's what it is really.  More than five years of massive egos, games, a psycho, controlling, micromanaging, manipulative advisor who, up until a month ago, was the barrier between me and my goals, who wouldn't have phantom grad-limb stress after all that!  And then there's the very real stress of look for and applying to jobs.  But, hey I'll take this stress over grad school stress any day!

So, what have I been up to this past?  Well I have continued with my internship, and it looks like there will be a position opening up soon that they want me to apply to :) still not putting all my eggs in one basket though, but it does help relieve the stress some.  I finished my month of being raw vegan but I'll write a separate post on that.  I have stuck with my exercise routine, I'm building myself back up to jogging for 5k straight, I run a 12 minute mile, so for that's around 36 minute.  So far I have built up to jogging for 15 min, walking 2 min, and jogging another 3.5 min for a total of 18.5 of jogging :)  I particularly pleased when I think that during the summer on a good day I would jog for 5 min straight once, but now, on a bad day (when I'm tired, sore, or haven't had enough water during the day) I jog for 5 min straight and another 2 min :)  I have been focusing on building healthier eating habits (related to the raw vegan month I did).  I've been reading a lot more, I started and finished a book in less than a month...for me, that's big!  I'm a slow reader and while in grad school I didn't feel like coming home and reading a book for fun so I really hadn't read anything for fun in quite some time.  I quite like it!  I have a whole list of books to read, I'll busy for quite some time.  I'm hoping to read even more once I have a job and don't have to spend time after my internship searching for one.  I have been watching my TV shows (this Fall is a doozy!), and I have been seeing more of my friends :)  I have also been doing some digital house keeping stuff and going through my e-mail accounts, particularly my campus account, and deleting or saving e-mails since my account will expire a few months after graduation.  I've been organizing my pictures and other digital files on my computer, scanning lose papers and reducing the amount of paper I keep.

So, I've been keeping busy, but I've been doing normal human things and not crazy academic things.  And every once in a while I have to pinch myself and remind myself that this isn't the dream :)